Christina ....still a roxychick on the inside

yah i know its been forever.....life has been so stressful that i am so over this livejournal myspace crap! haha
my life out side of school and home is amazing...that is the few hours i dont have practice and not locked down in my fucking house. i am lucking for the amazing people in my life.

Home....my dad is and will always be a dick! he has his nice moments but hardly ever. i hate him most of the time....and strongly dislike him the other times. i hardely ever love him. he is never there for me. he doesnt care about me or what is going on in my life, but yet he thinks he has the right to contorl everything about me by never lettng me do shit!...i have news for u thats how kids rebel even more! he is lucky i am not fucked up like have the kids at my school.

that brings me to the next subject school....umm school
its pretty easy this year i have all a's and never do homework til last min and still get bye....thank god!
protfolio day is coming up i am excited!
i miss last year so much ....it fells like i only have one friend left that hasnt graduated!...kinda sucks
I hate all the 2 faced girls that changed everything about the group of friends i have left! i cant stand them cause they change who they are friends with every fucking day....get over it....i hate that shitt...i speak my mind

colorguard!!!...goddddd....its so stressful....it isnt fun anymore. the poeple are so two faced. and i love being captain but i hate it at the same time. I hate how everyone has to hate me because i have to be mean to them.....i have to ....i dont want my team to suck...its hard love! they dont get it...they think i am power hungry or picking on them....i'm not. they need to understand that i need things to get done....if they dont i get sooooooooooooo stressed and go into panice and start to get controling cause nothing is getting done!!!!! AND I HATE GUARD OF THE MONTH!!!!!! its a populared contest.....i have done so much that no one cares about! and no one notices because they think it is part of being captain and its not i go above what i am spos to do but w/e!
i just wish the girls on my team will one day fell all the stress i am feeling so that they understand y i acted the way i act. and being captain is so not easy! i love it but it isnt easy

yah what eles is new.....everything is most likely spelled wronge!!!!

cant wait till christmas and TN

hey WE ARE GOING BACK OUT.....and its the right thing...but i dont want to talk about it...so yah

first game is friday WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT and we have pep rally....we are performing....WOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

i cant wait...i love our show this year...i think it is my favorite



\

my weekend was really...people think i am a bad captain but...f them
i do alot for the time wether u see it or not


ummm yah i am waiting for practice to start so peace yo

so i guess u guys win.....we are over. My eyes hurt so bad from crying all day during school. i feel like such a stupid " little girl" I fell in love and got hurt. i thought this would last way longer. being heart broken sucks. the one person that i thought would never hurt me did.

They say he isnt good enogh for me....but wake up...i was in love...that means that he was perfect in my eyes. I hope he regreats it....every last bit. when he looks for a new girl friend i hope he thinks of me and thinks about how no one will compair.

If i could turn back time i never would have asked the stupid question that killed everything. every time i see, hear, and think about something that reminds me of him I cry. This isnt fair. Y me......Y did freaken god make me the way i am. Y do i fall for guys ...give them my heart....then let them break it to a million little peaces. You may think this is some little emo blog....but it isnt.....i hate being sad....and i am venting it out

I dont understand it all yet. i am still lost in space. Like how can u say u love some one so much then like 5 hours latter break there heart. I fought to keep it....maybe u should try

I hope he knows i stuck up for him today when my friends were like oh he is just a jerk....i said no he isnt...i stuck up for u

And to make my days way worse....i fell down the freaken stairs.....the freaken vending machin at my money....people wouldnt leave me alone....i couldnt stop crying....and i had practice when my contacts were all foggy....GRRRRRRRRRRRRR lol Y DOES EVERYTHING FALL APART ALL AT ONCE!!!!!!!!! FUCK....i have to say life is giving me the underhand right now!

but i am trying to be a good sport.....maybe one day everything will come back together...maybe he will relize what he did....but i am not waiting much longer

THIS IS NOT ME TRYING TO BE A BITCH...he is a good person...i just think he made a bad choice....oh well ...bummer



sorry if things are spelled way wronge

Current Mood: pissed off

so my boyfriends friends want to judge me and talk about how we dont belong together....dont u think we can make our own minds up....his good friend told him that all his friends were talking about how me and him dont fit together.....bull crap!!!!! GET A LIFE...WORRY ABOUT UR OWN ....and not mine....for ur info my life is great and we dont need ur oppion

SO i thinks its been forever sence i wrote something in here.....the only think that hasnt changed is I STILL HAVE MY AMAZZZZZING BOYFRIENDLOL


hummmm

SUmMER : my summer was full. felt like it went so fast. I had summer school and work and colorguard and band camp. I am so over work....u have no idea.

BEING CAPTAIN......ahhhhhhhh ITs great but i have to do alot and every thing i do has to be perfect. i am so stressed out and if feels like they dont concedier me anything.

I want school to start i want to meet no people

I died my hair....its darker and has red in it now....its ok....it hair....

I hit my head with my rifle today i have a hugeeeeeeeeeeee bumb it hurts...eh

MALL ....4 of the officers ( one being me) have to perform at the oveido mall on sat. at 6 30.......ummm I am scared

I miss my boyfriend


It fells like life have took me by the had and pulled me so fast i have no clue what is going on around me. \

I am TRYING and PRAYing to loss weight......(i am a girl what do u expext)
i hope when i go back to school people dont think i got uglyer lol.....And dont act like u dont no what i am talking about......u always see some girls who u are like OMFGksdfsdf what happen to them lol

My head hurtssss

I love the new girls on my team....mostly brooke and katie

we had a team sleep over.......... IT WAS AMAZZZZZZZZZZZING and the funnest color guard event ever
................after all i gave birth to jessica there


I WANT TO GO GET MORE SCHOOL CLOTHs......................


i miss SAM..she is is JERSEy........I WAS JUST THERE....IT WAS WONDERFUL

I MISS MY FRIENDS.....I CANT WAIT TO SEE THEM


OPEN HOUSE THRUSDAY....AND BRUSTERS NIGHT
maybe i will see u crazy kids soon


LOVE YAHS

Current Mood: contemplative

so i would like to start off by saying sorry to anyone who i have hurt with the writings in my livejournals. i write my live journals at the peek of my emotions. I didnt meant to hurt you even though i know i wrote some pretty harsh things. i am not going to take them back because thats how i felt that one night....but i will tell you i not mean what i wrote. I hate to hate poeple. idk what it is about u...maybe it is just jelousey. I would never punch you....i wouldnt hit anyone. its kinda hard to explain.....i am a very complacted person to understand. I dont fit in with you and the rest of his friends...and it makes me sad. he is either with you all or with me or at work. I NEVER SEE HIM.....i wish that i fitted in with u all but u guys have been friends for such a long time. i dont hate you even though i wrote that mean stufff.....i was just really made when i wrote it snd i apologize. I dont love you either.....cause it i acttted like we were friends and stuff that would be fake of me...and i dislike fake people. i mean i hope when day we can talk and stuff maybe become friends. but for now i am starting of with a sorry.....i am kinda suprised i am saying sorry...but it is the right thing to do because what i wrote was really mean...and i am not a mean person. I DONT HATE U AND I DONT WANT TO PUNCH U.......but i think i am jelouse of u and upset that you spend way more time with my b/f then me....but i dont want to be controlling and i want him to hang out with who ever he wants to.



i think this sounds like a whole lot of dkjhfgajshdgjahdjjdghjs i hope it makes sence and i hope you read it......you no who u are

once again sorry if i hurt u

and sorry for my spelling i no it sucks

i hate this one girl so much and it seems like she is always with my b/f. she gets drunk at his house and the passes out on his floor. then what does he do the next morning..... goes out to breakfast with all his friends and her being one of them. i cant take it. everytime i find out she is hanging out with her i start crying. i hate crying AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. y cant he just stop hanging out with her! i hate her so much. i get the worst vibs from her. i want tto punch her so bad! well thats all for now

so its been a long time sence i have wrote in this......i havent wasted my time lately being that i have the most wonderful b/f everrrrrrrrr! I AM IN LOVE WITH THAT KID! i cant beleave school is almost out ehhhhhhhhhhhh. ummmmmmmmmm i am trying out for captain i want it soooo bad. he isnt going to tell us till friday! i dont want to wait well i am hopeing. please keep me in all of ur prays....pray that i make captain. WE GOT YEARBOOKS........mines already freaken full jeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


thats all life is good


peaceee out

SO i am sitting her very lonely in my room waiting for prom to end so i can talk to my boyfriend. I miss him so much....We were spos to hang out today but i guess he got to busy and forgot to call me back. :-( . like idk today kinda sucks alot.....everywhere i turn i am reminded about me not being aloud to go to prom and how much it kills me.

On the other hand....i dont want my boyfriend to graduate...well i do i dont want him to fail...but i wish i ment him sooner. i love him so much and i dont want to break up ever....but idk he said that we will just "go with the flow" but i dont want to flow to lead to bad stuff. i dont want it to be the end of the year...it sucks so much just thinking about all the friends i have made that are graduating sucks. it brings me to tires. I am GOING TO MISS MY ERI CUH BUTTERCUP SOOOOO Much...i love her with all my heart. i am going to miss everyone on my team. my heather caluduicc!!!!!, i hate to say it even my lunch table who talk about sex and drugs 24/7 and play the penis game with spin the bottle. i have had the best memeorys of my life this year....and 1/2 of them were from my lunch table. AND I AM GOING TO MISS MY BOYFRIEND.....ah jdghjlsdhg jahgjhajghjagjgkjhagkjlh I WISH I CAN TURN BACK TIME...




one a good note....SAMS PARTY WAS FUDGEN SWWEEEEEEEET last night...i didnt get home till about one last night i was so tired. BOB looked so hot in his black shirt and green tie i got him...i love him. Her party was like soooo fun...me and kelly and sam and kelly where danceing like strippers lol we where even danceing on the ground at one point. RYAN GOT HER A BLUE GUITAR she was sooooo freaken happy! I LOVE HER SO MUCH...she gave out 16 roses to her 16 most important people in her life and I GOT ONE! I LOVE HER so much ...i am so glad she isnt graduating



thats all i only have 2 more hours till i can talk to my b/f !!!!! i dont want to bother him durring prom

<33333333

STATES WAS WONDERFUL TODAY!....i miss bob. I am starting to have a little more respect for the drummers in the band....they are a little less mean and some of them seem really cool. the bus ride today was soooooooooo fun lol. and james hit me on the head with my rifle :-(

STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND
STATES IS TOMARROW
I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND

thats about all.........yesterday i hung out with bob hehe we saw stay alive it was a maz inggggggg and then we went shoppingggggggggg<3333 i love him so very much

i love my boyfriend.....he told me he loved me yesterday....and i am cool with the whole prom thing now. i can trust him more than anyone. :-D . i am about to go drop my applacation off at brusters....with me luck. then i am going to hang out with heather....i miss her


<333

So I havent wrote in this in a while. Bob asked me to prom…I cant go. I hate my dad. And to make it worse he asked me today if it was ok that he went with another girl cause her b/f didn’t want to go. I didn’t have time to tell him how I felt (nor do I want to tell him how I feel) before he left to go help his brother. To be honest I started to cry. But I don’t want to mess up his prom and stop him from going with who he wants. I am scared. I trust him but idk who he is going with or if he has ever liked her or if she is really pretty. It sucks but oh well.  I don’t want to seem like the jelous girl friend but it kills me inside. Break has been ok. I miss bob sooooooooooo mush.

Friday: went to the park and had a bbq with sam Kenny bryan Kaytee Charlie alex karleia and other people. Then went to sams house to swim

Sat. I had my show and bob came. Then at the very end tommy showed up WERID

Sunday I saw bob I went to see the play with hi, <3

Monday went to tommys house and watched stuff….lol….then we all went putt putting <3bob

Tuesday nothing really..shopping

Wed went to sams then the y

Today nothing, cryed alittle, miss my mommy
Tomarrow ….beach hopefully



Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I feel like shit

Current Mood: crappy

I CANT WAIT TILL FRIDAY!!!

humm saturday was ok....

I HAVE THE BEST BOYFRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD!

I HAVE THE BEST FRIENDS IN THE WHOLE WORLD

I GET TO GO TO THE GYM TOMARROW YESSS

orgey? :-/ grrr

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k thanks

SO I LOVE MY BUTTER CUP SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!....her name is ericuh!!! I <333333 her. she is one of the sweetest persons i have ment this year. I LOVE HER ALOT ALOT!!!! AND SHE IS MY SECOND FAVORITEST GIRL IN THE WHOLE WIde WORLD!!!!!
I LOVE U BUTTER CUP!


anyways...today was kinda shitty....mrs.parmalee is a asswipe! i hate her! she always picks on me! and yells at me! soi was like fuck her she is going into the bully box! THATS RIGHT I PUT HER IN THE BULLY BOX IN THE MEDIA CENTER....if u didnt no our school had a bully box now u do! and mrs. parmelee is in it! ehhhhhhhh shes a bitch!

if i hear the words...die and hair in the same sentence one more time this week i will shoot myself in the face! ,.....for ur 411 u dont have to die ur hair to stand out ...u already do <3


BOB MADE ME A GRILL CHEESE THIS MORNING WOOT!!!!! <333

thats all

<3333

Current Mood: disappointed

hummm
so my birthday was sunday....it sucked lol. well nicoles party was fun but it wasnt my party.

i miss bob and all my friends alot ....i want to go back to school.

i really want a job. but i have to wait till may when color guard season is over with...i really am going to nned a job over the summer

my summer is going to be packed. i have to go to new jersey for my grandparents party thing, then i have summer school both parts. the i have music and motion camp, then color guard camp for two weeks, and i am doing a musical over the summer, and i need a job! HOLY FUCK!

so we have a show this weekend at coco beach . i am scared we got moved up a division and there is only 3 groups in our dividion this show. ehhh. its going to be close. no matter what we are going to place. i hope we dont get 3rd.....so it is possible we can get 1st in AA. idk i hope we do good. i think i will cry if we get 1st place in AA. omg the though of it. ehhh. i dont want to think about it anymore.

I CANT WAIT tILL MY PARTY ...only 10 more days omg i hope this week goes by fast.

i think i am going to do a solo for spring show and hopefully a show with me kim and jenan.

i am really scared for the end of the season and officer try outs. i have really been working soooooooooooooooooooooo hard to improve myself so i can be captain next year. everytime he needs someone to do something i offer a hand. i think my jr. year will suck a butt load if i dont make captain. besides the fact that it will aready suck cause 1/2 my friends are leaveing me! :-(
at lest i will still have sam.

i decided that i am not takeng protfilo next year b/c i realllllyyyyyy want to take photo....so i am getting my shudle changed :-D asap.

my grades are droping...not good. i have a c in spanish and a c in english. i no i can bring up my english grade but spanish...idk.... to be honest i didnt even want to take spanish..i no that is y i am doing bad in it. i wanted to take french but my parents wouldnt let me. grrr

i have the stupid isearch paper coming up :-(...i start it tomarrow. i have no clue what i am spos to do.
fcat is coming up....grrr i hate f cat i think i failed the writeing part cause i had the stupidest promt EVER!!!!!!!!!

yah so i no like every thing is spelled wrong but thats ok....<3

I <3 all my friends and i miss u!!!

Current Mood: drained
Current Music: hellogoodbye...calla nd return

oh yah....I TURN 16 on SUNDAY....ParTaaaaaaaaaaa

so if u dont know by now.....u must not have a life outside ur house. j/k. but....Me and Bob are going out! :-D .....he gives me butterflys WooT!

so this is how it happened:
he asked me if i would like to help him with his photo project after school yesterday....i said yes.
well he had to take like alot of pics of himself!....so we went to this park...idk what park but it was realllly pretty. and he let me use his camra and i took 48 pics of him! ...and on the last one he was sitting on a fance and we kissed and then i was like are u going to ask or what? then he asked!

and it was great...then he told me on like that he knowa what it feels like for the world to stop for a second...and i got butterflys haha.

everything feels so normal ...like the same just with kissing now. i guess that is because i have never really dated a guy i was friends with before. :-D

anyways at lunch today tommy made us play this stop hat game and i was the only person who got it but i didnt no how i got it! WTG...GRRRR lol

<3bedtime....i think

Current Mood: i have a b/f wOOT
Current Music: call and return

so valentines day is tomarrow .....let me tell u how much i hate valentines day.....A LOT! that is beacuse i have never had a freaken valentine. well this year i am giveing bob a little something even though we arent each others valentines.......oh well he is worth it. haha and he will probley read this so idc.

tiday was realllllllllllllllllllyyyyyy cold out brrrrrrr. and at practice i droped my rifle on my bad finger like 5 times! it always lands on that finger. now i cant move it. it hurts.

right now i am copying panic at the disco for jilly.

the freaken bamd has fba on my party and like now 6 people dont no if they can come. right now 10 people are for sure coming.......thats not a big number i am pissed. i invited 30 people :-(

YAH WE ARE GOING TO STATES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and championships isnt on prom anymore....its the day after(thats good for the seniors.....lol cause i am most likely not going lol)

Song: U cant take the fight from the kid,so take the kid from the kid from the fight

good song.

Current Mood: giddy
Current Music: panic! at the disco